Drug-free Delivery; Definitely not for the Faint-Hearted

For anyone who has ever talked to me about having a baby, you know that I LOVE the epidural.  I have often said that I want to go into the hospital to deliver a baby backwards; so they can put in the epidural before I even get into the bed.  I'm serious about that.  I feel no shame in saying that I want a pain-free delivery.  I have experienced plenty of pain in my life; I know what it feels like; I don't like it.  My idea of a perfect delivery is laying in bed, pain-free (of course), laughing with my husband, listening to Stan Getz and watching Oprah.  (Oh yeah-- that was Anthon's birth!!)   I had only two requirements for finding a doctor here in Japan:  #1  He gives epidurals; #2 He speaks English.   I found a doctor (one of the very few here in Tokyo) who fulfilled both.

As you can probably discern from the title of this post, Ella was born sans epidural.  All I can say is that I should have known.  Everything about this pregnancy has been much more difficult-- I should have anticipated a dramatic finale.  

Here's the story:  Saturday morning Tony and I headed to my doctor's office.  The doctor wanted to do one final check before we went into the hospital.  After the all clear, we headed home to pick up our bags and then took a cab to the hospital.  The plan was to check in and start an IV with a very low dose of pitocin.  My OB was to come in about 3 pm to administer the epidural and rupture my membranes, and we'd anticipate an early evening delivery.  Ahhh, the best laid plans!  Everything was right on schedule until just before 3pm, when the nurse informed us that the doctor was running behind and wouldn't be there until 4pm.  No biggie; I still wasn't even uncomfortable.  In fact, I was so comfortable that I decided to take a nap.  

At 3:30pm I was asleep; at 4:45 pm Ella was born.  The 75 minutes in between were pure hell.   Just after I woke up I began having VERY painful contractions, and by 4pm I was ready to push this baby out.  Unfortunately my doctor was caught in traffic-- and the midwives wouldn't deliver my baby for me.  Instead, they put my legs above my head so I had to work against gravity, and they told me to breathe.  I had taken lamaze classes in Pasadena-- but I'll tell you what, visualizing "the wave" and hee hee hee breathing did absolutely nothing for me; I needed to push that baby out.  The next thing that I know, the midwives are pushing the baby back into me.  They are giving me instructions in Japanese-- which I don't understand; I'm trying to "breathe" and shouting at them in English to get their hands off of me and just let the baby come out.  Tony tells me that the hospital doctor is coming-- just to hang in there.  The hospital doctor arrived, stood there, and watched me.  I distinctly remember looking up at him in my pain-induced delirium and shouting for him to deliver my baby; get her out of me.  Nope.  I just had to keep waiting (and screaming) while the midwives held my legs up and push my baby back inside of me.  Finally, my OB showed up and Ella was born about 60 seconds later.   Literally.  Everyone was just waiting for him to get there.   What was the point of having midwives and a hospital doctor?  I don't know, but it was an absolute nightmare. 

We checked out of the hospital Monday morning, not even 48 hours after Ella was born. This was quite unusual, as the typical stay in a Japanese hospital is minimum 5 days.  The staff kept asking us if we were sure we wanted to leave.  Are you kidding me?  This is the place where they push your baby back inside of you and other strange things that I won't relate over the world-wide-web.  We will do fine at home, thank you very much. 

I asked my doctor what had happened and how that situation could be avoided in the future.  Obviously, if he had been there at 3pm, I would have had my epidural.  If he'd been there at 4pm, I could have simply pushed my baby out.  But honestly, who would have thought that I'd go from asleep to delivered in less than 90 minutes?  His guess is that I just deliver babies really quickly  (a pretty good guess considering my sister and my aunt both have about a dozen contractions and then deliver).  I was only on a 1/2 strength pitocin drip-- so it wasn't that I'd been given too much hormone.  And my water didn't break until I was at a 10 and pushing.  He said in the future he would always suggest a scheduled delivery-- with pitocin and an epidural administered at the same time, otherwise I might not realize I'm in labor until it's too late to get to a hospital.  

But, as horrible as the whole ordeal was, I still have more to be grateful for than I have to complain about.  First and foremost is my beautiful little Ella Nadine who was worth every ounce of that pain.  I honestly adore her.  I could spend the whole day snuggling her and it would be a good, productive day.  Second is that Ella and I are doing great.  She doesn't seem to have any ill effects from being held in the birth canal, and I am feeling fine and recovering well.  Third, that I didn't go into labor spontaneously.  I only had 30 minutes between really feeling like I was having meaningful contractions and feeling that I wanted to push.  I would have had our daughter in the back seat of a cab if I'd waited until I thought I was in labor to go to the hospital.

After this experience, I am even more firmly rooted in the "give-me-the-drugs" camp.   I know quite a few of you endorse natural birth-- more power to you my friends.  I'll take the stick in the back and listen to my jazz!

Ella Nadine Cannon

The baby kimono from the hospital (it is Japan after all).

The family of 4 (don't you love Anthon's expression?)

My little girl and me.

For more pictures, check out Tony's website.